you know you've been gone too long when...

• the route the taxi takes home from the airport is alarmingly unfamiliar (as in you swear you have never been on this road before) and you are certain that he might actually be taking you somewhere other than your house
• your two year old becomes absolutely hysterical when the bed he has been sleeping on (which consists of a couple of blankets and a pillow on a pile on the floor in the corner) has been cleaned up when he goes to cry and have a fit on it
• you can't remember the names of everyone at church
• you reach down to adjust the seat in the car using the automatic lever to the left and find that there is, in fact, no automatic lever there and that in your car the lever is manual and is under the seat
• your kids sleep in until 9:30 when church is at 10:00 despite several attempts to wake them because they appear to be permanently on Utah time
• you have a monstrous stack of mail and it takes you two full days to go through all of the mail you received while you were gone